


there is hope, but not for us.

by catumaga



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: F/M, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-28
Updated: 2014-03-28
Packaged: 2018-01-17 06:46:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 691
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1377766
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/catumaga/pseuds/catumaga
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Please don't hate me", she says.</p>
            </blockquote>





	there is hope, but not for us.

**Author's Note:**

> spoilers for arrow season 1 in the end notes

"Please don't hate me", she says.

 

 

The taste of vomit sticks to her gums and Tommy's coat, draped over her, smells like pine and after shave. He looks at her with those bright blue eyes and something aches inside her.

 

"Never. Never", he says, slightly shaking his head.

 

She stutters out an apology and Laurel's eyes are soft, kind. She isn't threatened and Thea feels like a little kid again, as Tommy ushers her into the car and turns away, leaning into Laurel, a hushed conversation whispered between the two. She'd been so sure- he'd looked at her in the eyes and told her, there's this girl I want to impress and she'd thought-  She looks away when they kiss.

 

She doesn't speak for the rest of the ride, feet pressed against the car's carpet, heels abandoned in the alleyway, spattered with puke.

 

He drives fast, one hand on the steering wheel, the other arm resting against the car door. She stares out the window, watching the city lights pass in a blur of yellow and red, forehead grateful against the cool glass. The warm liquid courage has abandoned her by now, leaving her cold and empty.

 

She feels her eyes starting to burn and thinks of the white powder in the little plastic bag stashed behind her Etiquette Trophy, next to the framed picture of her and Ollie, at his 7th birthday party. It had been Power Rangers themed and he'd insisted he'd be the red power ranger. Thea had dressed up as the pink one, at her mother's orders, even though the red one had always been her favorite.

 

"Thea."

 

She doesn't turn her head.

 

Closes her eyes and pretends to be falling asleep. He doesn't say her name again.

 

They pull up at the Queen Residence, wheels crunching under the gravel, by the angel fountain. She barely looks at him, dark make up smudged and puke breath isn't how she wants to face him right now.

 

She gets out, clumsy, stumbling, grateful for the camouflaging darkness. She pretends she doesn't hear him repeat her name. She pretends her walk into the house isn't one of shame and regret. She pretends that she isn't all alone in this huge echoing mansion, that her resurrected brother gives a fuck about her and that her mother isn't dry swallowing pills to simply get through breakfast.

 

Her footsteps sound hollow and she sinks gratefully into her bed, letting out a breath she didn't know she was holding. She jumps when she hears a knock on the door.

 

"Thea?"

 

Tommy is standing by the door, clean pressed shirt taught against his shoulders.

 

"Oh..hey". She blinks, straightening her back slightly. "Do you need something?"

 

"Uh- no. I just-...I wanted to see if you were okay."

 

"Yeah- yeah I'm fine." She nods, and smiles, if a bit shakily. He looks unsure, but nods back. Something inside her shreds and she needs him gone.

 

"Maybe you should-"

 

"Thea." This time he walks over, closer to where she until they're a foot apart. "Look- about tonight-"

 

Her cheeks flood with heat and this really can't be happening.

 

"Oh my god, Tommy, please don't."

 

"-no, listen"

 

"Tommy seriously. Please. Don't." There a silence in the room, and she wants so badly to let her guard down, despite the burning humiliation, to sink into his arms, to have him hold her. "You should go."

 

There's a moment of silence.

 

"Okay. But listen if you need to talk? I- I don't know where Olliver is right now but-", he huffs, frustrated. "Just please call me if you need anything okay? Anything at all."

 

His eyes are on hers, intense, serious. She nods, not really sure how to respond. He ducks forward and for a second she thinks he's going to kiss her- and closes her eyes only to feel the dry brush of lips against her forehead.

 

"Goodnight Thea". And his voice is soft again. She keeps her eyes closed until she hears his footsteps recede completely. When she opens them, her vision is blurry and she can taste the salty tears. What a waste of a night.

  


**Author's Note:**

> i finished arrow season 1 a while ago but this episode killed me so i just had to write it  
> i might turn it into an AU series where he doesn't die? maybe
> 
> you can find me in tumblr as scottymccalled, don't be shy and say hi!


End file.
